That Naive Girl

This New DeLew has never been known as a fashion guru. Back in the olden days, pre-marriage, when I was a 'Young George', I was morally against 'cliche fashion' (as I would call it), because I strongly believed it communicated materialism and consumerism. At the end of freshman year of college, I donated over half my wardrobe because I decided to take a stand against materialism's hold on my life. And although that decision resulted in wearing the same black long-sleeve shirt every day of my college career, I truly believed that this was one of the ways I can be subversive in society. That is, until I needed to dress up for some event and I realized that I didn't have anything fancy. And let's be real here- my definition of fancy was (and kind of still is) 'anything that isn't cotton'. And in the end, I would bow to the god of materialism by raiding my roommate's closets. But anyway, I reflect on that time of my life with a sense of endearment. Part of me says 'what a naive girl', but the other part of me says 'where has that girl gone?'

This past weekend we were in Madison, Wisconsin for a wedding, and we had the chance to spend some time putt-putting around the little city. On Sunday morning we were sitting in an independent coffeeshop surrounded by college students who were working on papers amidst their facebook stalkings. The student next to me was wearing a 'Free Palestine' t-shirt while his girlfriend was using political theory to bash one of Sarah Palin's speeches. And for whatever reason, it brought me back. I was reminded of the numerous thought-provoking discussions that I had in coffeeshops that totally rocked my entire understanding of reality. I remembered that feeling of challenge and uncertainty that I experienced when I was discovering a new way to perceive the world, this society, and my life in the midst of it all. I remember those late nights that we would spend dreaming of ways to be subversive against mainstream society, to fight the system of injustice, and to be communities of peace. These are the visions that make my heart beat. They are conversations that feel raw, that make me feel more alive.

And I asked myself, when was the last time my understanding of reality was rocked? How often do I question the powers that be and seek ways to be subversive? Not just for the sake of being subversive, but because I believe in an alternative vision for this world- a world where people choose love over hate, community over self, and humility over pride. Have I just become another cog in the machine of society?

I refuse to believe that these thought-processes are only for certain stages of life. Yes college students may have the luxury of time to theorize about life and society, but now ideally, I may have the resources and ability to put some of those theories into practice. It may take a different form now, as I can't wear a black long sleeve shirt to work everyday. But that doesn't mean I should just fall into the routine of materialism and consume everything I can. It just might require a bit more nuance now. And however counter-intuitive it might seem, we must continue to live in the midst of complexity and be comfortable with challenge. Now is our time, whatever stage of life we are in, to challenge what we consider 'normal' and be open to alternative visions for how we ought to live in this world- however subversive they might be. It's not naive, it just might be the way we were meant to live.